May 30, 2009

Girlfriends make for a much better Mood

Who needs Effexor when you have girlfriends?
The past two weeks have been a whirlwind of kids being sick,me being sick, school functions, IEPs, trying to get ready to leave, and generally feeling the need to be super mom while all this chaos is unfurling around me.
Today I took a break to pull it together again, and bring some normalcy back into MY life - not as a mom just as myself. Only me. ME.
It’s nice to say that. ME. It’s easy to put me last because the kids need me. It’s easy to put me last..... because I just forget about me. Until it comes and smacks me in the face and I decide that unless I get a little ME time, I might lose my mind. That was today.
So this is what I did to find myself again… I spent time with several women I love. I emailed close girlfriends and talked to them about things that were bugging me. Spent time talking, just talking with a dear dear Auntie and gossiping with a Jamaican pseudo-Grandma. I called my best girlfriends and yelled about things that angered me. I arranged ‘dates’ with girlfriends that I had been missing… and will see Sooon, in CO, for brunch, dinner, play-dates, movies. I went to Whole Foods, Yep, with a girlfriend. I spent time with women. Women whom I love & admire.
And it worked. Sure enough, I feel rejuvenated and alive again. Ready to bring on another month of sickness, traveling, training, mommy-hood, etc.
It’s amazing what women can do for one another. I find myself in awe of the friends I have. Sometimes it’s easy to forget how great they are, until you take away the pressures of life and just share a little. These are some of the things I re-learned today:
…Sisters are hilarious, generous, and very competitive when running from the parking lot in the Florida rain. They will babysit when they are sick, and bring dinner too.
…Mothers are human. They can complain with you about men, and can understand when you are tired of being mom. They won’t judge you, and they will ‘forget’ the conversation afterwards
…Aunts are more than just your mother’s sister. They are people who love you and wish they spent more time with you. And with a little effort they could be a great person in your life.
… Grandmothers are amazing. Seriously, amazing. They know everything. From sex and marriage, to gardening and dinner. They know it all. And if you just listen, you might learn something that could change your life.
… Old girlfriends give you a perspective that you need. They get you out of your current world, and make you feel young again. They bring you back to grammar school & high school... silly decisions and all. They know your family and they know you. They cut through the bull-shit that you tell them, and know what is really going on.
… New girlfriends allow you to soar. They don’t have past preconceptions about you, and let you dare to be who you want to be. They help you get there by giving great advice and by making you laugh
… Mommy girlfriends lend the support you need to get through the day. They love your kids because they love you. They don’t judge your parenting or your children, and they often teach you by example. They let you perform ‘parenting experiments’ on your children AND theirs - to see what works and what doesn’t.
… Non-mommy girlfriends remind you of the ideals that you hold, and the life you want to live as a person outside of being a mother. They remind you of what is at your core, and encourage you to embrace it.
… Best girlfriends do it all. I don’t know how. They just do.
All in all, I am rejuvenated and soooo ready for a ROAD TRIP... thanks to my girlfriends. I learned a lot, and I hope I don’t forget it all. However, I know I can count on my girlfriends being there to remind me when I do.

2 comments:

sarah bess said...

This is a great post. How'd I miss it? Would be fun to hang out with you, Deanie.

CJ Field said...

Friendship can be the best medicine!! I'm glad you have your pals to make you feel better!